void

it is this unexplained feeling of loneliness. of wanting to pass on when you are fifty. of having loved and lost and repeating that endless cycle without learning why. of acceptance and betrayal and small hurts and that feeling of not having done anything worthwhile. it is sitting staring at a 15 inch monitor and typing inanities while you should be sleeping. it is accepting a friend back into your life hoping they will stay, now that they have come back. it is hoping the one you love the most picks up your call or returns it. and it is this wonky feeling of not being trusted. it is this emotional black hole, from where nothing escapes, not even what you once felt for someone. it is timeless, and probably a message from the stars that we are, all of us, insignificant. it is probably all that, or just something that defies explanation. it is a void, and you know what i am talking about.